Thank you Paula

Recently my mom’s best friend past away. She has been one of the sweetest and most kind souls that I have ever met in my life. She would never speak ill of anyone, ever. She always had a loving essence around her. I was blessed with her influence mainly through a second layer. She was my Mom’s best friend, but yet I still felt her power.

Paula was taken from this earth by brain cancer. Cancer takes too many people we love. I feel like we need to check our perception of cancer. Brené Brown teaches that growth happens through discomfort. She said that she has not accomplished anything in life or professionally in comfort. I believe that death is another form of growth. Growth from this phase of life to the next. Paula is growing in her existence and in her intelligence. Paula is still progressing spiritually.

Now, I am not speaking of any religious theory or dogma in particular. I personally don’t believe in organized religion anymore. I believe in spirituality. I believe that this life is only a phase of our existence and those beautiful people who pass from this life, are growing into something else.

I will give you a real life example from my life. My Grandpa Blymiller was not around much growing up. I maybe saw him 5-6 times in my whole life. I mainly saw him on Christmas Eve at the Blymiller Christmas party. He wasn’t there every year, only sporadically. If you know my Father, you know he lived a rough life. His whole family has stories of heartbreak from the death of Mickie Blymiller, my dad’s sister when she died in a car accident at the age of 16. Well in 2008, as my Grandfather was at the University of Utah on his death bed, we were all told to go in and say our goodbye’s. All I could think of to say to him was “I’m sorry.” I’m sorry for not finding a way to connect with him in a way that made him want to be around me and my family. I know he heard me. I have felt him in my life.

I personally struggle with addictions and challenges similar to my Grandfather, and my Grandpa’s story and his influence have provided me with strength. Now I tell this story because it is real to me and if you search your family line, you will find stories that connect people’s pain to how they act. Emotional pain influences how we behave.

I encourage us all to take this pain from the passing of Paula, and we transform it into energy that Paula can use. Now Paula has always been an angel in people’s lives. She has provided people with compassion, love, and empathy. She is being called on a mission to grow those powers to help even more people. Paula is not leaving us. She is in us. She lives in us and through us by the example that she set in our lives. I know it hurts to see the people that we love leave this earth. The only thing that seems to make sense, is that they are going to serve a Higher Purpose. Paula is going to be one of God’s greatest love warriors available to him. I believe that if we allow our energies to be transformed into love, compassion, and empathy, Paula can take those energies with her to do the work that she has been called to do.

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